We said good-bye to our dogs over these past two weeks. Thinking abstractly about what would happen if one of our pets were aggressive with kids or we had an allergy issue is so very different than going through the actions of “rehoming” your loved pets. I have been largely quiet about Gabriel’s eczema since proclaiming the good that goat milk did for him. And while that did well for him in the short run, all the symptoms came back after a couple weeks. Moreover, the itching had never gone away and that, it turns out, is the real issue – as the itching leads to breaking open the skin leads to itching and possible infection and so forth. As the hunt for a cause continued (or really started as we had to wait so long to see the medical specialist) it came to light that we cannot test for allergies until Gabriel is one (April) but that given my allergies to cats and my dad’s to household pets, G was most certainly having trouble living with our dogs. Deep down, I think I knew that, we had gone through about every food trial possible for a baby on a liquid diet. I didn’t want to hear it, until I had to though.
We got Zippy as a four month old pup soon after we got to Vegas. He was my buddy. Nathan traveled a lot at that time and I had just moved across the county to a town where I knew precisely 2 people. Better than none, to be sure, but I was lonely and Zippy was my cure. He was good company and cute to boot. He felt, you could tell, displaced by Dante and when Gabriel arrived he actually gave me a withering look. His life with us was not what it once was – not multi-mile evening walks and hours of petting and playing. Replace all that with being chased, pestered while he ate and surrounded by constant noise and commotion. As a somewhat high strung very small dog, he wasn’t happy anymore but that didn’t diminish what we felt about him.
Lily entered our life when, after displaying a lot of energy, we thought Zippy needed a pet. Lily arrived as a 7 week old and quickly grew to be twice Zippy’s size (though she was supposed to be the same). She is a loving girl with a sweet dopiness about her…and never quite so much energy as Zippy. She was great company to me as well and would nap on Nathan as long as he would allow. She was most upset at losing her place on the couch when kids came into the picture. Though she adapted better than Zippy to the little ones, I think she too longed for the days when she was one of the babies.
In honestly assessing our situation, Nathan and I came fairly quickly to the realization that the only ones benefitting from the dogs in our house was us. Time for the pups to find homes where they are the babies and give our baby the best chance at being healthy all on his own. Putting our child first is easy most of the time and while there was really no decision here – the dogs needed new homes, period – it has been hard to accept. But the search was on and both Nathan and I put feelers out at work and through church and to our petsitters. Our petsitters have been part of our life for almost 7 years…being on call for labor and there when we were both traveling for work. It was perhaps hardest to tell these lovely older ladies that our pups were up for new homes. One thing I have wrestled with is feeling like a failure. I believe firmly that your take on a pet for its lifetime and here I am sending out two pups with half their lives left. Then again, maybe they would find homes better suited to them now than ours.
In a moment of kismet, just a couple days after we made this decision a business associate came by the house – and mentioned that she had a 7 year old mini dachshund, too! Oh really? Would you like more mini dachshunds? Well, Zippy worked his charms on her and before I really had a chance to internalize what was happening – and without being able to get in touch with Nathan – Zippy had a new home. Crazy, right? Perhaps it was best not to linger in good byes. And let me tell you I am pretty sure Zippy has boxed us up and put us on a mental shelf – his new sibling finally matches his energy levels, the pups are totally the babies there and he traded his sleeping crate for THE BED. Zippy – you provided me with the love and company I needed for a long time. I am so glad you have a home that fulfills your doggie daydreams.
For her part, Lily realized that Zippy was gone and that she must be next. When I sweet talked a family from church into seeing her, she hid behind me, cried, barked at their four year old and generally acted fearful. Ok, like my heart wasn’t breaking enough? Now I added the mental calculus of figuring out how to introduce Lily to prospective adopters and not make her seem like a rehabilitation case.
For a few days it was feeling pretty desperate with no leads and interest falling off. Then one of the petsitters randomly met a woman in a park who runs a group called Animal Bonds, sort of a dog whisperer, who offered to take Lily’s information and send it to her contacts. Sure, ok. I sent an email and heard nothing back. Then about two days later it became apparent that Lily’s information has made its way to a good chunk of the employees of the Clark County School District (4th largest in the US, I believe). And I got a slew of emails. My first reaction was recoiling at all these people wanting to take me dog and their brash questions about her color and weight. But in the same moment my heart swelled and tears came as I realized that there were a lot of good folks wanting to help our pup live a good life and that we could find her a fine home. It is hard to recognize that you are replaceable but the hard truth was that since the boys came along, the pups had taken second string and this really was a chance to find them happier homes.
Though Lily had somewhat settled down from when we adopted out Zippy, she was still unsettled. But I had been in communication with a lovely elementary teacher-to-be about her and guess what – they were just what we were looking for. A couple, with summers off, who like walks but not runs and want to celebrate Lily’s birthday with her. Our elementary teacher came with her husband yesterday to meet our girl. I was elated to find out he is an orchestra teacher. For middle school. Brave, brave man. And Lily took to them…though she still knew what was happening. With this match made, off she went for a new life and there we stood. Not dog owners for the first time in nearly a decade. Lily – you provided us such love and devotion. Please provide that to Leann and Joe.
So there we were no pups to give veggie ends to, no fuzzy heads on my lap, no sweet dachsie faces in mine. Also no worries about Dante chasing Zippy, no guilt that I haven’t walked them in…awhile, no barking to disturb nap time. But here’s the real thing: no Gabriel itching. Through ways I will talk about in future posts, we were able to give Gabriel a trial stay in a home that was dander free. The difference was swift – his medications were able to be reduced by about two thirds in under a week.
Parenting is an ever changing challenge. Sure there will be hard talks to have, discipline to figure out, negotiations over green beans, curfews and colleges…and they will be hard. Saying good-bye to our pups though has been the hardest thing so far.
Reader-Friends, this is one of many changes we have going on right now…though I wish I could promise a return to regular posts I don’t think that will happen quite yet. Please do keep visiting – Facebook or a subscription will let you know when there is a new post. Thank you!
